Helping Survivors Of Authoritarian Parents, Siblings, And Partners: A Guide For Professionals

H e l pi n g S u rv i vo r s o f Au t ho r i ta r i a n Pa r e n t s , S i b l i n g s , a n d Pa r t n e r s Helping Survivors of Authoritarian Parents, Siblings, and Partners considers the notion of the authoritarian personality in a f­ amily context  and examines the extent to which authoritarians traumatize the people closest to them. Building on primary ­research, Dr.  Maisel presents first-person accounts of life with authoritarian family members and provides clinicians and other professionals with tactics and strategies for helping clients who struggle with the impact of these experiences. This unique look at authoritarians at home serves to redefine the authoritarian personality, expand our understanding of family trauma, and give voice to the silent epidemic of authoritarian wounding. Eric Maisel, PhD, is a retired licensed psychotherapist, active creativity coach, and internationally respected expert in the field of mental health reform. He is the author of more than fifty books, writes the “Rethinking Mental Health” blog for Psychology Today, and provides lectures and workshops worldwide. Helping Survivors of Authoritarian Parents, Siblings, and Partners A Guide for Professionals Eric Maisel First published 2019 by Routledge 711 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10017 and by Routledge 2 Park Square, Milton Park, Abingdon, Oxon, OX14 4RN Routledge is an imprint of the Taylor & Francis Group, an informa business © 2019 Eric Maisel The right of Eric Maisel to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reprinted or reproduced or utilised in any form or by any electronic, mechanical, or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publishers. Trademark notice: Product or corporate names may be trademarks or registered trademarks, and are used only for identification and explanation without intent to infringe. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Maisel, Eric, 1947– author. Title: Helping survivors of authoritarian parents, siblings, and partners: a guide for professionals / Eric Maisel. Description: New York: Routledge, 2019. | Includes index. Identifiers: LCCN 2018021277 (print) | LCCN 2018029573 (ebook) | ISBN 9781138498860 (hbk) | ISBN 9781138498877 (pbk) | ISBN 9780429507717 (ebk) Subjects: LCSH: Authoritarianism (Personality trait) | Abusive parents. | Parent and child. Classification: LCC BF698.35.A87 (ebook) | LCC BF698.35.A87 M35 2019 (print) | DDC 155.9/24—dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018021277 ISBN: 978-1-138-49886-0 (hbk) ISBN: 978-1-138-49887-7 (pbk) ISBN: 978-0-429-50771-7 (ebk) Typeset in New Baskerville Std by codeMantra For Ann, Forty years into this adventure Con t en ts 1 Updating the Concept of the Authoritarian Personality 1 2 The Aggression Cluster 9 3 Please Break My Rules! 17 4 Walking on Eggshells 25 5 I. Hate. My. Mother. 32 6 Pe