E-Book Overview
In Barbara Keesling's latest book for women about sex, the noted sex therapist mines the idea that virtually every good girl yearns in her heart to be a bad girl.
E-Book Content
The Good Girl’s Guide to Bad Girl Sex An Indispensable Resource for Pleasure and Seduction
Barbara Keesling, Ph.D.
Copyright © 2001 by Barbara Keesling This edition published by Barnes & Noble Digital, by arrangement with M. Evans and Company, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without the written permission of the Publisher. 2002 Barnes & Noble Digital ISBN 1-4014-0522-3
Contents Introduction
1
Chapter 1
Bad Girls Feel Good about Being Bad
4
Chapter 2
Bad Girls Have Sex on the Brain
24
Chapter 3
Bad Girls Dress the Part
42
Chapter 4
Bad Girls Walk the Walk
64
Chapter 5
Bad Girls Know How to Talk Sexy, In and Out of Bed
84
Chapter 6
Bad Girls Know Their Bodies
106
Chapter 7
Bad Girls Touch and Tease
126
Chapter 8
Bad Girls Love to Climax
151
Chapter 9
Bad Girls Play with Toys
180
Chapter 10
Bad Girls Break All the Rules
207
Appendix
Shop Till You Drop
212
About the Author
215
Introduction
Every good girl I have ever known wishes somewhere in her heart that she could be just a little bit bad. She wishes she could turn a few heads with the way she walks, raise a few eyebrows with the way she talks, raise a man’s temperature when she enters the room, and leave him breathless when she exits. But that isn’t how most of us were raised. If you are like most of the women I know, and I’m guessing that you are, you were probably raised to do the right things and to say the right things. To be respectful. And kind. And decent. And modest. To be, first and foremost, always a “lady.” In short, to be a Good Girl. The place you needed to be the epitome of “good”—the most careful and ladylike of all—was the place where it was most dangerous to be the least bit “bad”: behind closed doors in the arms of a man. Why? Because making love should be something lovely and special and soft and gentle and quiet and private and very, very feminine—something to be shared in a discreet and loving way in the quiet evening hours with the one you love. This was the picture society painted for most of us, and to bring that idealized picture to life, you had to be good. Did Good Girls have sex? Of course they did. Good Girls could even enjoy sex, as long as they didn’t enjoy it too much. But Good Girls didn’t
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The Good Girl’s Guide to Bad Girl Sex crave sex. And Good Girls didn’t breathe sex. Good Girls certainly didn’t exude sex and Good Girls didn’t live sex. All of that was for the Bad Girls. Oh, those Bad Girls. You know them well. For years you have listened to their stories and watched them turn heads. How did they get to be so sexy? How did they get to be so hot? How did they get to be so free? How did they get to be so bad? And what does that feel like? If you’re like me, you have asked yourself these questions. My goal is to help you find the answers—answers you can live with and love with. My name is Barbara Keesling, and I am a sex therapist in private practice in Southern California. I have been a sex therapist for over ten years. Before receiving my doctorate I worked for many years as a professional surrogate partner—someone who assists a sex therapist in a clinical setting to help the therapist’s patients work through sexual obstacles. Clearly, I have spent a great deal of time in the pursuit of sexual understanding, but don’t let th