The Asexual

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The Asexual A EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Michael Paramo LAYOUT EDITOR Michael Paramo Copyright © 2017 The Asexual 1 The Asexual To whom it may concern, I began The Asexual in October 2016 with some concerns, regarding both my limited experience as well as whether anyone would submit to this journal, yet remained hopeful. I have since been overwhelmed with the response, having now received a varied collection of poems, prose, personal essays, and more from writers who identify under the ace umbrella. Some of these writings are included in the subsequent pages of this first issue in addition to a short piece by myself. I would like to thank everyone who has submitted their beautiful words for this debut issue as well as anyone who has supported the journal on social media and elsewhere. I aspire to continue this project and develop it further in the future. With love and appreciation, Michael Paramo 2 The Asexual TABLE OF CONTENTS Disbelieving 4 Michael Paramo The Silent Pond 6 Shunya Ta Sheath 7 Shunya Ta In the Forest 9 Amanda Amos Consuming A 11 Shannon O. Sawyer Philophobic 14 Moira Armstrong Pink Lipstick 15 Moira Armstrong The Couple 17 Maribel C. Pagan It Was 23 Kenyatta JP Garcia Consuming 24 Kenyatta JP Garcia Ace in the Hole 26 Gregory Morrison 3 The Asexual DISBELIEVING By Michael Paramo We all have flaws and weak knees. For me, it is in the man’s arms, his face, his chest, his hair, but never his penis, if he were to even have one. It may as well be a snake. Are snakes that small? No, and they are much more beautiful. Dick pics are such a turn-off. Let my man be clothed, at least, down there. Disbelieving. For I could love only as best as I could, to be classified as incomplete, either from hatred or pity, some sorry form of recognition. Most often though it is just nothing. “You’re just gay.” “You’re just a faggot.” I’ll show you a faggot. 4 The Asexual Michael Paramo is a queer non-binary asexual Latinx master's student in California. Their academic work has been accepted for presentation at national conferences, such as by the Popular Culture Association/American Culture Association as well as the U.S. branch of the International Association for the Study of Popular Music. Their research interests include queer studies, intersectional approaches, media representation, romantic attraction, gender identity, and asexuality. They also deeply enjoy the pleasure that music brings into their life. 5 The Asexual THE SILENT POND By Shunya Ta I have no desire for wo/men for a thing or being. I have contemplated in solitude and meditated on my body to direct desire towards words, objects, and bodies yet my body seeks only death like silent water in the night gazing at the stars wary of the day’s pollution the washer man's obscene touch and the nakedness of animals invading the sphere into me all over me. 6 The Asexual SHEATH By Shunya Ta There is no thing my being that you can grasp to grasp your own ground. You may move around your senses like a hand grasping the other body through the cloth. Yet, beyond cloth beyond the body lies what you may never grasp whether living or dead. I, a (wo)man, splurge my inner blood and mucus onto the sheath of reality to show you that Man bleeds without being attacked the body burns without any fire. 7 The Asexual Shunya Ta is a non-binary demi-sexual being who re