Claiming Your Place At The Fire : Living The Second Half Of Your Life On Purpose

claiming your place at the fire This page intentionally left blank RICHARD J. LEIDER DAVID A. SHAPIRO claiming your place at the fire LIVING THE SECOND HALF OF YOUR LIFE ON PURPOSE Claiming Your Place at the Fire Copyright © 2004 by Richard J. Leider and David A. Shapiro All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permissions Coordinator,” at the address below. Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc. 235 Montgomery Street, Suite 650 San Francisco, California 94104-2916 Tel: (415) 288-0260, Fax: (415) 362-2512 www.bkconnection.com Ordering information for print editions Quantity sales. Special discounts are available on quantity purchases by corporations, associations, and others. For details, contact the “Special Sales Department” at the Berrett-Koehler address above. Individual sales. Berrett-Koehler publications are available through most bookstores. They can also be ordered directly from Berrett-Koehler: Tel: (800) 929-2929; Fax: (802) 864-7626; www.bkconnection.com Orders for college textbook/course adoption use. Please contact Berrett-Koehler: Tel: (800) 929-2929; Fax: (802) 864-7626. Orders by U.S. trade bookstores and wholesalers. Please contact Ingram Publisher Services, Tel: (800) 509-4887; Fax: (800) 838-1149; E-mail: customer [email protected]; or visit www.ingrampublisherservices.com/ Ordering for details about electronic ordering. Berrett-Koehler and the BK logo are registered trademarks of Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc. First Edition Paperback print edition ISBN 978-1-57675-297-5 PDF e-book ISBN 978-1-57675-877-9 2008-1 Text design by Detta Penna Copyediting by Patricia Brewer Cover design by MvB Design Contents Invitation to the Fire vii Prologue At the Fireside: The New Elder ix Introduction The Four Flames of Vital Aging 1 Chapter 1 The Flame of Identity: Recalling Our Stories 13 Chapter 2 The Flame of Community: Refinding Our Place 47 Chapter 3 The Flame of Passion: Renewing Our Calling 67 Chapter 4 The Flame of Meaning: Reclaiming Our Purpose 103 Epilogue Keeping the Fire Alive 127 Notes 141 Index 143 About the Authors 151 v This page intentionally left blank Invitation to the Fire If we were to describe our lives using the metaphor of fire, we would recognize that there comes a time when the flames have settled into a comfort